A clean fresh start.
I’ve been lost. Took me 28 years to find someone whom really put herself out there for me in time of need and help.
I hardly speak, let alone tell anyone how I really feel about things and how life is like for me. Being emotional, maybe. It’s never really that easy for me to truly express myself in certain ways or things that I really wish to say and for that I have to apologise for not being straight up and direct at times.
Beats me but I’m simply just like that. I can be self motivated and positive being on my own or being pushed to my very limit as and when its required but I too can be quiet and timid when I’m feeling down or some where somehow I knew I screwed up.
Aside from all this gibberish I have to put this out that I’m grateful with the people I have in life; what I meant by people is, you. Something that I truly appreciate and am thankful for.
How often do you find yourself being in a position that makes you feel/tell yourself that it’s either you do something about it to make it right or just let it sit in a little corner of that thick skull of yours and let it consume you throughout your life. Sadly I was once there and I got out of it.
Given by blessings, lots of praying and soul searching. I chance upon you and I never regretted the second I took the chance/opportunity to know you and myself as a person living in this world. Life truly gets tough at times and you took every bit of me and pushed me out of my darkest time/miseries in life and yet here you are still standing by my side despite our differences. This made me what I am today.
No relationship is near perfect or perfect. It’s a rocky road, you have arguments here and there. You have the tendency to not agreeing with certain decisions or actions made but every bit of this leads to something greater especially when we always stand by each other and fight for what we all know called love.
With that said, really I’m feeling so grateful and thankful for all the help I’ve got from you. Something I truly appreciate.
Enough of that. Let me share about the things I’ve been doing today.
Honestly it’s been a really long time,
I had a great day roaming around, getting lost and such but it truly was an amazing day. From being at home with the laws, to Somerset running errands and window shopping, having Beef Ramen at The Ramen Stall, riding to Mt. Faber & Kent Ridge Park. Stopping at locations and having 2 sticks of cigarettes or 5 minutes of sitting, relocating and ending up with me getting us to a bad spot with not a single view.
Her choice of spot. Mine was just dark and eerie.
Feels like Japan for a second.
“Haha!” I died when she teased me about how bad I was at sitting to embrace the moment and at how bad I chose a place/spot with no single view but trees, grass and a dead space with no wind.
I would say that it was one of those many 6 hours that I feel grateful for. Seems like the way I typed this down doesn’t feel like 6 hours but truly it’s 6 hours of riding, walking around, sitting, eating, riding, taking pictures, small talks, long conversations, serious conversations. All these lead to one thing; understanding and knowing one’s feeling. Key factor I’ve learnt today is acknowledgment and appreciation.
Spending time in a such short time doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad. It means a lot to have that chance to spend that time on someone whom you love and loves you.
I guess thats that. Thank you for having the time to read. – Syed Al’Bukhary.
P.S: I love you. If ever I get where I want to be. You’ll always be the one I prioritise.